As we approach Father's Day this weekend, you'd be hard-pressed to find a dad on the planet who hasn't at one point or another been ready to give his left leg if his kid(s) would Just. Go. To SLEEP!! Whether it's another book, a drink of water, monsters in the closet or any other excuse that kids conjure up to stay up they always find a way. Well, here's the book to end all books and put bedtime shenanigans, well... to BED. Of course it has to be narrated by the only man who can deliver it in the way it was intended... I censored the NSFW Samuel L. Jackson dialogue for little ears:

PS- Neither I, Oldiez 96 or Townsquare Media advocate this as an appropriate children's book, only for the adult comedic relief it was intended for...

 

 

And now the NSFW version as read by the author himself...