Screw Wheaties, dude. Breakfast sandwiches are the 'Breakfast of Champions.' Put it this way: after your last bender, did you wake up hungry for a bowl of fiber-y wheat or were you searching for savory meat, fluffy eggs and melted cheese — all wrapped up in a toasted English muffin? Right.

Well, Hamilton Beach has your back. Their new Breakfast Sandwich Maker means no more rushing to McDonald's before the ridiculously early 10:30 a.m. breakfast menu changeover time; no more Dunkin' Donuts sandwiches loaded with mouth-searing cheese whose temperature is equivalent to molten lava and no more freezer-burned Jimmy Dean sliders catching fire in your microwave.

Just keep the proper breakfast ingredients on hand — that means shopping on the rare occasions that you're sober — and slide them into their designated order in the Breakfast Sandwich Maker. It cooks everything in five minutes, and all you have to do is eat the finished product. Hamilton Beach even made an Apple-esque commercial. Watch:

Until you can grill hot dogs with an app on your iPhone, the Hamilton Beach Breakfast Sandwich Maker is your new favorite invention.

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