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How To Successfully Go To The Bathroom At Work

It’s a sad, but true. No matter how hard you try, how accurately you plan, it’s going to happen at some point: you will have to “go” at work. This is probably by far one of the best articles I’ve read in months, hopefully you’ll enjoy.

Photo by Sean Gallup/Getty Images

“As the children’s book tells us, everyone poops, and everyone has to work, but while we have to work together it doesn’t mean we have to poop together, or at least acknowledge that we are all pooping in the same place”.

It’s the great unspoken occurrence of the workplace, it’s taboo. So, here are some easy rules from Gawkers to follow so you can do the number 2, without ruining your professional reputation.

Know the Topography

Every office is different in how the toilets are set up. Some offices have one-man units that are good in terms of privacy but it’s hard to escape any blame for any fumes. Others have multiple stalls so it’s a little easier to blame the stink on another coworker.  

Know the special “Toilet”

Every bathroom has one, the one bowl that is reserved for “that job”. Use it, No one can judge you if you’re in the right place.

Double Check the Door

Make sure it is locked. If it’s not, you are headed for a career-destroying disaster.

Drop the Book

If someone sees you walking around your workplace carrying a book or a magazine, they know where you’re going and your cover is blown.

Maximize Productivity

At home you may be one of those people who take their sweet time, but this is work. The longer you linger, the longer the chance that you’re going to get caught and embarrassed. So get in, and get out.

If you died laughing at this like I did, I suggest you read the full article at Gawkers. This is only a taste of what the article has to offer.

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